Alligators in the sewers? Are you high?

Why yes, there are & yes, I am. In Alligator, there is a big, goddamn alligator living in the sewer. The gator has been feeding on a steady diet of dead, lab tested dogs for a good twelve years. Our male pattern challenged police officer (this very bad running joke runs throughout the entire film) is the first to face the monstrous reptile and live, but, surprise, no one believes him. The disbelief lasts up until said fictional alligator breaks through a concrete sidewalk and begins a human buffet of extreme prejudice throughout the city.

I have not seen this movie for many years and forgot about the side plots of the crooked industrialist's chemical dumping, dirty politicians getting their comeuppance, and wonky experimental drugs causing insatiable appetites in any mammal that ingests them.

Director and writer John Sayles has worked with these kind of themes before in Piranha and many of his other films. In more recent years, Sayles has made his stance more politically upfront in the pro-union Matewan and might-makes-right Men With Guns.

And in my slightly stoned state, I began to think about capitalism running amuck (offshore drilling comes to mind as does Amazon) and decimating everything in its path for more market share and bigger profits. So whether this is a monster movie or clever metaphor in lizard clothing, I would suggest giving it a try.